Hanzo The Razor: Sword Of Justice - 1973 - Japan

Hanzo The Razor: Sword Of Justice - 1973 - 6/10
AKA - Goyôkiba  // 御用牙

 
Introducing law enforcement’s most innovative interrogator.
Hanzo is a righteous Edo officer, incorruptible, in pursuit of a prison escapee.
He tracks him by employing various S&M techniques on females who know “something”.
Oh, and his Razor nickname has to do with his terrifying schlong.
Nudity, torture, geysers of blood, misogyny, and a funky Blaxploitation soundtrack.
A wild film that would be surpassed by the sequel, The Snare.

Natural Born Killers - 1994 - USA

Natural Born Killers - 1994 - 7/10  

 
Oliver Stone’s freewheeling satire on America’s glorification of violence.
Hero worship of serial killers, mass murderers, cult leaders.
By genius of casting, Woody Harrelson is cast as the unstoppable, Juliet Lewis his match.
Violence is blood soaked, and pulls no punches about America’s comfort with killing.
Should this get a  remake, a script might include tolerance of pedophiles and rape.
Along with media doing anything for ratings, toss in “influencers” doing likewise.
Director’s commentary is essential for aspiring filmmakers, as Stone is nonstop with information.

Cat’s Cradle - 1959 - USA

Cat’s Cradle - 1959 - 6/10

 
Staccato cut film of firelight, sunlight, glimpsed females and a cat.
Unsure what the creator is trying to communicate.
Of course, this could be from the feline point of view.
Any one who lives with cats, however, will say they are far more patient.
Bracing short, furiously edited, not for all tastes.

Crime Without Passion - 1934 - USA

Crime Without Passion - 1934 - 6/10

 
Lee Gentry is the rare sort: an unscrupulous attorney.
Who gets clients acquitted by trickery, chicanery, outright dishonesty.
Sheesh, the sort of lawyer who will make you lose faith in the courts.
Meanwhile, relationship troubles.
He wants to dump passionate Carmen for a blonde iceberg.
Claude Rains delicious as the conniving cheat, while 17-year-old Margo is dazzling.
Strange Pre-Code, nevertheless.

Shiny, Shiny Bright New Hole In My Heart - 2006 - UK

Shiny, Shiny Bright New Hole In My Heart - 2006 - 6/10

 
Nathalie is a professional shopping advisor.
Her taste is impeccable; her clients are beyond affluent.
Envy, perhaps the contagion of being amidst such luxury, begin a slow grip.
Husband Jeremy is a doctor, so the credit card has a high limit.
Until spending brings more joy than mere ownership.
“Shopping addiction” which to me is another manifestation of the big empty.
Never enough, no matter how much, never enough.  Their souls are empty.
English subtitles = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369652

I, Claudius - 1976 - UK

I, Claudius - 1976 - 8/10

 
Spellbinding adaptation of Robert Graves novel, itself a distillation of Suetonius’ scurrilous accounting.
Long study of Claudius from his birth, agonizing childhood, ascension to the throne, murder.
Adultery, assassination, betrayals, vengeance, back-stabbing, this encapsulated the swath of human treachery.
Derek Jacobi, as the stammering, perceived fool is one of many pitch-perfect actors.
Brian Blessed as the boisterous Augustus, and Siân Philips as the venomous Livia.
Likewise John Hurt as the insane Caligula, and Patrick Stewart as the conniving Sejanus.
The budget on this was low, and the look lacks the polished gloss of later productions.
Nonetheless, this remains an astounding journey of political intrigue and murderous ambition.

Grave Torture - 2024 - Indonesia

Grave Torture - 2024 - 6/10
AKA - Siksa Kubar

 
After their parents are killed in a suicide bombing, Adil and Sita are sent to an ultra-religious school.
Where they are threatened, bullied, coerced, abused.
Years later, Sita slowly builds her vengeance.
On those responsible, and the religion underpinning society.
“… someone has to prove that religions intimidate people.”
Slow boil thriller from Joko Anwar waits until the final act to veer into full bore Horror.
Sita is a remorseless fury, damaging perceived enemies and innocents in her path.
Ending might have been meant for cultural authorities.
English subs = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369229

Marching Powder - 2025 - UK

Marching Powder - 2025 - 6/10

 
After being arrested for fighting, Jack is given a short leash.  Six weeks to straighten his life.
He’s 45, still brawling, addicted to cocaine, poor husband, worse father, sponge.
Acid humor throughout, yet this satire of yob culture has been done too often.
Dyer could do this in his sleep, at times it looked like he was.
Bristling dialogue enliven this.
No matter any sort of ending, his time seems numbered.
English subs = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369230

Attack Of The Robots - 1966 - France

Attack Of The Robots - 1966 - 5/10
AKA - Cartes sur Table

 
Dark skinned humanoids openly assassinate leaders and dignitaries.
Besides the skin, a dead giveaway is their special spectacles.
Though predating either, they resemble Autons and Cybernauts.
Interpol contacts retired agent, Al Pereira.
Pereira, a frequent alter-ego of Jess Franco, is played by Eddie Constantine for laughs.
Power struggle between Interpol, Chinese agents, and the evil controllers.
Two-fisted spoof of spy flicks and late Krimi is mindless fluff.
English subs = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369231

The Year Of The Plague - 1979 - Mexico

The Year Of The Plague - 1979 - 5/10
AKA - El Año de la Peste

 
It begins with a man sick on the subway, followed by doctors with suspicions.
Soon enough, medical types attempt to sound a public alert.
And are thwarted by politicians, the wealthy, and the ruling class who suppress.
Mexican contagion-fest takes way too long to ramp up, and is talky for too long.
Final half hour pretty good: public chaos, armed police, human sacrifice, mass graves, and bodies dropping like the city was sprayed with a can of Raid.
Despite script by Gabriel García Márquez, this ultimately disappoints.
English subs = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369232

Murder By The Lake - 2016 - Germany

Murder By The Lake - 2016 - 6/10
AKA - Die Toten vom Bodensee

 
Deaths on the Austria / Germany force two police departments to work together.
Male German, female Austrian.  Both, as we find out, tote baggage.
Three mysteries from the first year are solid, if soon unimaginative.
A simmering Celtic curse, rabies outbreak, promiscuous teacher.
Biggest issue is the reliance on the defective detective concept.
Say, for instance, your home is burgled.
Do you want to hear the cop talk about his financial woes or his partner’s cocaine habit?
The misfit officer is a bankrupt crutch used by untalented writers.  Replace them.

Un Chant d'Amour - 1950 - France

Un Chant d'Amour - 1950 - 6/10

 
Two convicts, separated by thick concrete, communicate and ignore.
A voyeuristic guard spies on both, more so as there is a homoerotic vibe.
Part experimental, part fantasy, part judgmental.
Prude alert, male nudity abounds.

Jason And The Argonauts - 1963 - UK

Jason And The Argonauts - 1963 - 7/10

Jason is sent of a bit of a fool’s errand by an unrecognized enemy.
Bring back the Golden Fleece.  A sheepskin?  No matter.
Jason assembles a team including Hercules … and some other guys.

 
Bare bones of this wonderful Saturday adventure classic.
Intrigue, combat, death, gods, goddesses, jaw dropping effects.

 
Stop-motion effects still hold up, and remain startling.
Herrmann and Harryhausen both fabulous.
CGI, what’s that?

Pick-Up - 1933 - USA

Pick-Up - 1933 - 6/10

 
Mary is handed $5.00, then released from the penitentiary.
In the big city, she’s soon down to pennies, when a cabbie takes pity on her.
Harry lets her crash in his apartment, which she soon spruces up.
They make a good team, with a bright future, except –
She neglects to tell him about a tiny detail … her husband … still in the slammer.
Racy Pre-Code (tame now) deals with suicide, premarital sex, crime.
Raft & Sidney star, plus a treat to see Charles Middleton as a good guy.

Amandaland - 2025 - UK

Amandaland - 2025 - 6/10

 
Recovering from a divorce, Amanda and her two children, relocate to an untrendy neighborhood.
A wannabee influencer, her brand, Senuous, is a nonstarter.
Vain, vapid, supercilious, she is pretentious, and ruthlessly mocked.
Of course, you know these types.  They are coworkers or, worse, relatives.
This gets funnier as it goes along, and one grows familiar with the characters.
Similar to Julia Davis fare (Nighty Night, Camping) albeit less savage, less sleazy.

Steve - 2025 - UK

Steve - 2025 - 7/10

 
There’s more to this life than you see, than you can imagine.
Eventually, things always have a way of turning.
Steve is headmaster for a school for those who used to be deemed Young Offenders.
Troubled lads, late teens.  Too much anger and testosterone.
The government wants to close these schools, so BBC sends out a crew.
Do the boys play nice?  Feign politeness for the camera?
From the getgo, everyone is in your face and frothing.
Know your tolerance.

Mona Best And The Beatles - 2026 - UK

Mona Best And The Beatles - 2026 - 6/10

 
Pete was attending college, until his mother bought a building and installed a music club in the basement.
The Casbah Club.
Pete then decided he wanted to be a musician.  And began drumming.  
Eventually joining an up and coming trio who had trouble retaining drummers: John, Paul and George.
The Beatles are the backbeat of this docudrama, yet the focus is on Pete, mother Mona, and driver, manager Neil Aspinal and his swirling relationship with all concerned.
Sound mix varies.  Otherwise, this may intrigue fans of the Fab Four.

A White Dress for Marialé - 1972 - Italy

A White Dress for Marialé - 1972 - 6/10
AKA - Un Bianco Vestito per Marialé

 
Friends are invited to Marialé and Paolo’s castle.  Yes, castle.
They have not seen them for a few years and are unaware of her condition.
A sumptuous dinner table is laid out and all don costumes - save for Marialé.
Everyone soon seems drugged - save for Marialé - and individuals devolve to their baser instincts.
Then the murders begin.
Opulent style over substance.  In essence, gorgeous to view, yet the plot is tissue thin and barely coherent.
Characters are mere sketches, reasons for deaths vague.
Perverse film, excruciatingly slow, not for all tastes.

The Cat Creature - 1973 - USA

The Cat Creature - 1973 - 6/10

 
During a rather odd insurance appraisal, middle of the night, no power, an adjuster is murdered.
A few precious items are stolen, leading the police to believe burglary gone bad.
Only the killings continue, and central to each is a missing Egyptian amulet.
Attributed to Bast, the cat god.
So-so TV movie.  Hokey script (Robert Bloch).  Old school cast (Sondergaard, Carradine, Kent Smith) mesh with new.  Lesbian angle muted, replaced with short-stature prostitute.
For cat lovers, likewise cat haters.  Best advice, avoid trailers and ad-slicks.

Giant Spider Invasion - 1975 - USA

Giant Spider Invasion - 1975 - 4/10

“Terry, don’t you think the junkyard late at night isn’t kinda deserted?”
“That’s why I suggested it,” she whispers and climbs on top of him.
Too soon, moaning car springs are interrupted by an explosive shock.
As a pellet of black hole meteorite strikes a nearby field!
Gamma rays, neutrinos, proto-matter irradiate tiny spiders.
Turning them into tarantulas, soon swelling into lumbering 50 foot carnivores.

 
Back home, Terry defends her Wisconsin virtue with a trusty iron.
A spring carnival begins, as well as a religious revival, amidst menfolk toting shooting irons.
This one has all the fixins of a trashy so-bad-it’s-good film.
Nudity, adultery, drunkenness, attempted incest, absurd monsters.
Yet, a pair of scientists (one a follower of Velikovsky) talk and talk and talk.
Turning an enjoyably terrible movie into Snoozerama.
English subs = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369086

Account Rendered - 1957 - UK

Account Rendered - 1957 - 6/10

 
Money is a for spending, darling.  What use is it in a bank account?
So declares Lucille, who spends, flirts, cheats, coerces, and winds up dead.
Police have a surplus of suspects, including husband Robert and friend Sarah.
At less than an hour, this has no character development, just a brisk pace.
Suspects, motives, false trails and red herrings.
Solid B-film mystery.
English subs = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369085

Persuasion (Read) - 2025 - UK

Persuasion  (Read) - 2025 - 7/10

 
Monica Dolan, shifting from room to room, tells the story of Anne Elliot and Captain Wentworth.
A young couple, deeply in love, yet he has only prospects, no wealth.
Consequently, Anne is persuaded by her great influencer, Lady Russell, to decline his proposal.
Eight years follow, whereupon Anne and Wentworth meet again.
Dolan is an emotive speaker, fleshing out characters and undercurrents.
Excellent companion to the acclaimed 1995 film.
English subs = https://sub-scene.com/subtitle/3369084

Hardware Wars - 1978 - USA

Hardware Wars - 1978 - 6/10

 
After enduring Boxey, his Daggit, pyramid, Pharaoh helmets, I needed to clear my brain.
Princess Anne-Droid, space jockey Ham Salad, the Tin Man, a Hoover, Wookie Monster, more!
El cheapo parody is stuffed with in-jokes, and actually reverent.
Also, for aspiring editors, producers did a great job distilling the original into a dozen minutes.
May the farce be with you.

Battlestar Galactica - 1978 - USA

Battlestar Galactica - 1978 - 5/10

 
Pilot for the juvenile series that followed, dubbed by Harlan Ellison, “Battlestar Ponderosa.”
Those crafty Cylons sue for peace, only it is a deception!
The colonies, all the battlestars destroyed, save for the Galactica.
Henceforth, ragtag survivors head toward the mythical planet called Earth.
SciFi adventure of the week followed, targeting teens, then grade schoolers, finally lobotomy patients.
After Star Wars, we were so ravenous for SciFi, even this rusted toaster had OK ratings.

Prelude - 1927 - UK

Prelude - 1927 - 6/10

 
“The boundaries which divide Life from Death are best shadowy and vague.”
Our gentleman, reading Poe, listening to Rachmaninoff, grows anxious.
Imagining his own, premature burial.
For those of hypersensitive bent, I’m afraid this still happens.
Surprisingly effect short.